How to Go "Back to School" During the COVID-19 Pandemic

As the summer season starts to wind down, one topic seems to be on a lot of people's mind: how will the country's teachers and students go "back to …

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5 Qualities You Need to Reach Your Biggest Goals

Everyone has big dreams that he or she wants to achieve in this life. While some go ahead to achieve each one of them, there are others who realize a …

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New award-winning social supermarket for Liverpool’s Walton Road - The Guide Liverpool

The revenue raised from the in-store sales will be invested in the Community Hub, where members can gain access to personal development support, with …

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Council Post: How New Finance Grads Can Leverage An Unexpected Career Delay

Antonio De Shawn Spears is a global executive, author and investor. He is the COO of City Global, a global creative and consulting agency. There’s so much anticipation and excitement leading up to college graduation. With your future at your fingertips, the last thing you want to deal with is an …

* This article was originally published here

You Don’t Have To Suffer To Reach Your Dreams

You don’t have to burn out in order to reach your dreams. You don’t have to work yourself until you’re exhausted. You don’t have to keep going until you’re near tears. You don’t have to push and push and push yourself until you feel like you’re going to collapse. You can succeed without self-destructing in the process. In fact, the chances of you succeeding are going to rise when you’re in a safe, healthy, comfortable place. You need to take care of yourself. You can’t allow your mental or physical health to become a problem for your future self to handle. You need to take care of yourself today. You need to put the same type of effort you’ve been putting into reaching your dreams into keeping yourself healthy.

You don’t have to check milestones off your t0-do list at the same times as your ‘competition’ in order to reach your dreams. You don’t have to graduate at a young age. You don’t have to get paid six digits at a young age. You don’t have to reach every dream at a young age. Even though you might feel like you’re falling behind when your peers continue to climb the career ladder and you’re staying in the same place, you shouldn’t compare yourselves. Your journey is different, but it is still beautiful. You have to stop worrying about what everyone around you is doing and focus on your own path. You’ll get there eventually. It doesn’t matter when. All that matters is that you don’t give up hope.

You don’t have to sacrifice your social life, or your love life, in order to reach your dreams. Even though it’s important to work hard, and to take your commitments seriously, you shouldn’t work every hour of the day without any breaks in between. You shouldn’t ignore your partner and bail on your friends because you have other things to worry about. Your relationships matter as much as your dreams. Your play time matters as much as your work time. You need to create a healthy work/life balance. You need to rearrange your schedule so you can fit your loved ones into your day. You don’t want to lose them on your climb to the top. You don’t want to forget how much they mean to you.

You don’t have to suffer in order to reach your dreams. Yes, you are going to have to put in a lot of work. Yes, some days are going to be harder than others. But overall, you should be proud of what you’re doing. You should be happy to walk down the road you have chosen. If you’re miserable every step of the way, if you aren’t having fun anymore, you need to reevaluate your goals. You need to ask yourself whether there’s a better way for you to live. You don’t want to be so focused on creating a future for yourself that you forget to enjoy the present. Tomorrow matters, but so does today. 

* This article was originally published here

My Journey from Fear to Love

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end." – John Lennon

January - 2012

I remember sitting in a small dark room waiting for the surgeon to arrive.

My son had just had major surgery, and it had taken much longer than expected.

My stomach felt tense as the surgeon sat in the chair opposite us.

He looks at the floor as he started to speak.

"it's not good news," he said.

"We think he has a week left to live."

After that, my mind switched off. I felt my wife's head on my shoulder and heard her tears.

Was it a bad dream?

June – 2017

My feet feel heavy as I am nervously walking towards the divorce court.

12 years has come to an end, and it's time to let her go. I know I did my best, but somehow, we lost each other. Both stuck in our own pain.

As I stand outside the court in a small, smelly room waiting for the hearing, my thoughts drift back.

May – 1988

I am in the hallway after school, surrounded by 3 bigger guys.

They are laughing at me and pushing me. I know what's coming, and I can feel my heartbeat increasing, and my stomach feels tense.

I wish I could be anywhere else, but here, but there is no way out. I am surrounded.

I fell the kick in my chest as I fall to the floor and struggle to breathe. A few more punches and I hear their voices walking away.

I get up embarrassed and in pain, but I pretend I am okay. I remember what I have learned. Never show weakness…

August – 1998

This reminds me of something I have experienced before. I am in a harbor surrounded by 3 big guys with tattoos down their arms and neck.

I don't see the guy that has circled me, and suddenly I feel the punch on my ear. I drop to the floor.

Slowly get up and say, "are we done."

I get kicked in the stomach and fly backward.

Slowly get up and ask, "are we done."

And another round.

I should not show any emotions. That is how I survive.

I know this game…

June – 2017

I hear a voice and snap out of my thoughts.

It's the court lady, and she says the hearing is canceled.

As I get on the London underground, I close my eyes and drift off again…..

March - 2014

This is where it started.

He is an optimistic, energetic Italian scientist, and he is my only hope.

I tell him the story of my son and that only the treatment he is researching can save my boy.

He tells me that we need to raise $7.5 million to do the research.

He looks at me in disbelieve as I say, "okay, I will get that."

Whatever it takes to save my little boy…

June – 2017

I finally got home from the court.

I am looking out the window, and despite everything I have achieved, I feel empty.

My son is still here 5 years later, and we managed to raise $8 million. I have many friends, and I had a business with 50 staff that I build from scratch.

So why do I feel so empty?

I know the answer but am afraid to admit it because I am a man. I am strong, and I don't need anyone.

I had survived violent confrontations, built a business from nothing, helped save my boy when he was given no chance, I am helping to innovate medical science, and I have fought and won legal battles against our national health service…

I know I am strong, but I feel alone. Disconnected from others.

Suddenly I realize that I have made myself alone. Because I learned to only count on myself and to never show vulnerability.

I google vulnerability and find Brene Brown's TED talk, and suddenly I realize I have lived my entire life in fear. In survival mode.

While survival is essential and served me at a time in life, it's not really living.

But somehow being vulnerable and depending on other's feel scarier than a fistfight. Scarier than death…

So, I know what I have to do. I have to let my protective angle go as he is no longer needed, and he is holding me back from living.

I sign up for a course over the summer and jump on a plane to San Francisco.

All these hippies are scary.

They are so relaxed with touch.

It makes me uncomfortable.

They share things and cry, making my stomach cringe because I am terrified of having to do the same.

I want everyone to see how strong and manly I am.

It's circle time. Oh, I hate these. And, this time we have to share vulnerability with the group.

I am praying that someone will burst through the door and shoot me. It's America, after all. But to my despair, nothing happens.

As it becomes my turn, I am still alive. F…

I can feel I am shaking.

I tell the group about my son and the long dark nights I would stand and cry in the living room, scared to my core that he would not be alive the next day.

I never used to let anyone see me cry as they had to think I had it all together. But I was scared, so scared.

I finally break down and cry in front of the group. I cry like a baby.

They all look at me with love and compassion. They even seem more connected to me, and I feel more connected to them.

Something has happened that I have never experience before. I don't even know these people, yet they now know me better than my ex-wife, family, or childhood friends.

I feel I can finally be me. Strong and vulnerable.

I get a friend of mine who is a masseuse to give me a gentle massage on my stomach and chest as I know how much I dislike touch there.

I don't know why, but I can feel my body being tense and resisting.

I close my eyes and slowly let go. As I let the tension go, I can feel a little hurt and violated child inside me cry, and I let it. I am in hippie land now, so why now?

Something extraordinary happens. I am enjoying the touch. Yes, I really like it.

It no longer feels irritating. As I leave the course, I realize touch is one of my love languages, and I can't get enough.

Who knew that summer would change my life?

My friendships, my relationships, everything has changed since I came home.

I found the missing formula to intimacy and love, towards myself and others.

And it's not complicated. It just takes courage.

Like a plant needs air, water, and sun to grow, love requires safety, vulnerability, and acceptance.

I found the force. May the force be with you.

---

Thomas is an accomplished writer and blogger at Zen Sensa. You can see more of his work here and can connect with him, socially, here.

The post My Journey from Fear to Love appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

* This article was originally published here

8 Ways Successful People Spend Their Free Time

It’s common to see successful people in their element; you see them at peak productivity, working long hours, and showing off the talents that make …

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The Importance of "Win with Grace, Lose with Dignity!"

30 minutes ago Children MUST be taught from an early age about the importance of hard work, overcoming challenges, perseverance, and what it takes to …

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Why You Should Align with Values and Goals for a Better You!

Living your life in honesty and integrity... We come across so many people in life. Some may do anything to achieve what they want. They may cheat …

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Let Go And Let God Take Control

We all go through tough situations. It’s a given. Our world isn’t perfect and there will always be conflicts and struggles as we go through life.

There’s a lot of problems floating around us. Some of us lose our jobs, some have our hearts broken, some of us may feel stuck in our routine and feel stagnant, and so on. Life comes with storms.

But here’s what I want you to know.

Losing that job might seem as if the door was shut right in your face, but remember, when God closes a door, it’s because He is opening another one. A bigger opportunity. A greater blessing that will give you the best outcome.

Losing that relationship might have left you shattered, but I hope you don’t blame God for taking it away from you. He takes things away not to punish you. Sometimes it could simply be a protection. Perhaps it would have harmed you in the end. Or sometimes, it could simply mean He wants to give you bigger things. So don’t settle for less, and remember, if you trust Him, He won’t let you down.

Losing that motivation and feeling stuck in life might just mean you gotta go back to where you started. You’ve come a long way, and I hope you gain back your strength and inspiration in doing what you do, especially if that is your passion. It was placed in your heart so that it would prosper. So pray about it, because God sees your desires as well as your struggles.

You will have your own success. You’ll have your own wins; you’ll have it all. But you have to let go of the things that keep you from receiving all these blessings. You have to release that negativity in your life. You have to heal. You have to stop entertaining things and people that don’t serve your purpose.

Because the reality is, the longer we hold on to the things that are not meant for us, the longer we will suffer. The longer we try to force things, the deeper they will hurt us. But the moment we let go and we let God take control, the easier life will be.

So if you ever get stuck in a negative situation, I hope you find your way to see things in a different light. I hope you realize that everything will fall into its right place, because it is God that’s working things out for you.

* This article was originally published here

Confessions Of A Perpetual Runner

Do I get tired? Yes. Do I get lonely? Yup. Am I going to slow down? Absolutely fucking not.

Today, I got frustrated. I felt like I needed to go somewhere, anywhere but here. I wanted to book a flight or pack my car and just drive. This isn’t the first time this has happened. Actually, it happens a lot.

I’m a runner, always running. When I’m not running, I’m thinking about running. Not like the exercise—I’m more of a dance for exercise girl. No, I’m talking about running away. Running to something shiny. Running to a new beginning.

Lately, I’ve been practicing presence. I’ve learned how to find joy in the now. I meditate. I do more yoga. I sit in silence. I journal often. Honestly, I’m a better person. I’m so happy. Even on bad days, my disposition and my baseline is content. I want everyone to practice presence, to learn how to find joy exactly where you are right now, even if it sucks. Actually, I implore you to.

I realized something, though. I don’t want to lose the fire under me. I don’t want to lose the foot that always seems to be hanging out the door, ready to run. I don’t want to lose the part of me that craves more. I love my life; I am so grateful for each moment, even the sucky ones. I think sometimes we fall into the trap of thinking that wanting more means we’re not happy with what we have. I don’t believe that.

The Universe is abundant. There is always more. Put me by a fire on a cold, rainy day with some music, movies, wine, and popcorn and you’d be hard-pressed to get me off the couch. But I can promise you that at some point, I looked outside and thought about the rain, and the rain made me think of the Amazon, and that made me think of a retreat I’ve always wanted to go on. And for a moment in my head, I was there. And guess what? I don’t want to lose that part of me. And I don’t think you should either.

I think you have to learn how to be happy where you are. I think you have to learn how to practice gratitude, not because it’s a requirement or a rule, but simply because I’ve never heard of it not making your life so much better.

But if you’re a runner—if you dream of the places you’ll go and the things you’ll do when you get there, if your mind is always on the next idea and the next great thing—don’t stop.

Today, after a few hours of not feeling so great, I realized that even though wanting to be somewhere I’m not is not a good feeling, and even though I know there are spiritual teachers who I swear by who would tell me to find joy right where I am, I realized that I don’t want to stop dreaming. Even in my loneliest and most hopeless moments like today, where I don’t know where I want to be or how I’m going to get there, I just know I don’t want to be here. I know that that is me.

It is because I am a runner that I have always wound up in the most magical places. I’m not in a magical place right now, but I’m not going to stop running, because I know that with my head in the clouds and one foot out the door, always ready to run, there is no way I won’t get there again.

* This article was originally published here

There Is Discovery In Aloneness

I think people wait lifetimes for someone to join them—to catch a flight, to take a hike, a road trip, a chance.

I think people settle too quickly, afraid they might miss their chance. Settled with the wrong one, they miss their chance entirely. They forget the things they wanted to do, the dreams they had, the plans they made. They sacrifice themselves in order to appeal to their partner; in order to avoid walking through their life alone.

Alone is not a scary place. It is a place I visit often. In the woods, on planes, in cars across state lines. My favorite version of alone happens during long nights with a tent, a flashlight, and a good book. I seek it out on dirt paths, in coffee cups and old train stations. I stumble into it on Saturday mornings with a journal and a pen. It is there again in the evening with a sunset, as a reflection upon my day. Alone is the place I find my voice, my truth, my purpose.

Alone is not silent. It is loud with discovery. An entire melody can be discovered in the shuffle of your feet, along dirt trails, beside singing waterways and towering trees. Just listen to the sound of your breath, the thoughts in your mind, the beating of your heart—I envy the discoveries you will make!

If you are alone and waiting, I beg you to stop. I beg you to book the flight, to take the trip, to go for a walk, to do it alone.

The truth is, you will never stay lonely long. You will find with fresh eyes and an open heart, there is a world of people out there, alone but together. There are people who have done the exact things you fear and lived to talk about it. They are dreamers, poets, artists and they are you, too. Do not fear all the beautiful places to discover within your alone.

* This article was originally published here

Schools in Ontario to reopen for in class learning September 8th

Students in Ontario will be going back to class full time in September. Starting September 8th you can drop your children off at school.Premier Doug …

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Indoor Activities for Self-Care

If you’re looking for simple ways to keep you in a happy place mentally and physically, you just might have everything that you need right inside your home. Too many people tend to think that they have to go outside and explore to be able to find the peace and happiness that they’re looking for. […]

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11 Things I Hope You Learn In Your Season Of Aloneness

Humans are social beings, and in that comes the need to be with other humans, to be part of something, to be included in the lives of others. People aren’t meant to be alone forever, and they need companions and community. Nobody wants to be lonely, but being alone and being lonely are not synonymous.

There’s nothing quite comparable to a balmy summer evening, strolling along the downtown cityscape arm-in-arm with someone who makes you feel safe, who feels like shelter among the world’s chaos. And there’s nothing quite like the feeling that comes with knowing that someone’s heart beats for you—that there is another heart out there that embraces your quirks and failures and moments of goofiness and things that make you flawed but also beautifully human. There’s no substitute for that feeling of I’m finally home that you find in another person. But sometimes that feeling doesn’t last, gets lost, or slips away, leaving you to walk those same streets, but this time alone.

Being alone can be an uncomfortable feeling: It’s exposure, it’s being seen. It’s having no one to hide behind and no one to catch you when you fall. But being alone is a teacher, and its lessons are some of the most invaluable ones you will ever learn—and will only learn—in your season of solitude.

This is for those times when you are unattached to a significant other—whether you just left a relationship, or you’ve been on your own for some time now, or you’re trying to make something last that you know isn’t meant to because you’d rather take lackluster over alone—just realize that this season is trying to show you something. Everyone is presented with a season of aloneness, sometimes more than once, but whether you decide to use it or skip over it is a fork in the road leading to paths that will yield different results.

I hope you choose to embrace this time in your life, this period of solitude, and I hope these are some of the things you walk away with.

1. Being alone teaches you to make your own decisions, to become comfortable with and attuned to the direction of your heart’s compass, learning to trust it and follow it.

There’s no one else telling you which way to go, and this is the beauty of exploration, of finding and trying and failing and succeeding simply because you want to experience the vastness of the innumerable possibilities that lie ahead. Thinking about making a career switch? Itching to make a long-distance move and start somewhere fresh? Now is the opportune time. With no one around to try to sway you one way or the other, the choice is yours to simply explore.

2. Being alone teaches you to reach out to those who you may have left behind—whether intentional or not—when you were in a relationship.

It provides you with a new lens to help you refocus on all the connections you have, or have had, in your life, showing you a close-up of those you may have forgotten when your priorities were elsewhere. Maybe you missed out on spending time with your grandparents while you were preoccupied with your significant other. Or maybe the phone calls to your mother became more and more infrequent. Now is the time to change that.

3. Being alone teaches you that you can survive on your own if someone leaves you.

Whether by death or intentional separation, experiencing loss has a tendency to reveal your strength and show you that you’re capable of prevailing even when you feel like you’ve hit your lowest point and you’re drained of everything you are. Because there’s still some of you left, and it’s enough to keep going and start over again. It’s time to invest in yourself and rebuild something stronger and more beautiful with the broken pieces.

4. Being alone teaches you to be self-sufficient.

It teaches you to value hard work and every achievement you make, because it’s something you accomplished on your own. Making your own money and knowing that you are the only way to get what you want pushes you to continuously strive to become better. Being financially independent is freeing and shows you that you are the primary reason for your own success. Whether it’s your home, your car, or virtually anything of value, being able to say “I’m the reason I own these things” is an amazing feeling.

5. Being alone teaches you to become comfortable with the sound of your own voice.

You learn to recognize who you truly are as a person, everything you stand for, believe in, and won’t settle for. You learn about the things that give you a spark, a jolt, and inspire you to speak up because you’ve found something that matters to you.

6. Being alone teaches you to reflect on things you’ve done in your past and pave a new path for the future.

Maybe it’s a mistake you made in a past relationship that you wish you could take back. Whatever it is, being alone gives you the space to remember—but not dwell on—the you that you once were. And it gives you the freedom of a blank slate to map out a new route to the you you want to be.

7. Being alone teaches you to appreciate the little things, the quiet and subtle things you may not fully recognize at the time, but the things that truly make a huge impact on your life.

Whether it’s a stranger’s smile, a peaceful night cuddling on the couch with your cockapoo, or cracking open the spine to a new book by your favorite author, being alone teaches you to be grateful for the small, beautiful things in the world that sometimes you might overlook.

8. Being alone teaches you to listen.

It teaches you to become comfortable with the silence, to listen for whispers from God in the wind or the chirps of birds or the embrace of family. It hands you an amplifier so you can hear the hints, see the signs, and understand the messages that are trying to reach you.

9. Being alone teaches you to recognize your own value so you can one day attract someone else who will recognize it in you as well.

There is so much strength in simply standing alone, in letting the world see you as an individual. Refusing to hide and taking control of your own life is something not everyone is able to achieve. It helps you to zero-in on your designated place in the world, focus on what you want the outcome of your life to look like, and realize that no one else on this planet can make this happen but you. Understanding that you are irreplaceable will help you to attract the right person who will see that in you.

10. Being alone teaches you to open your eyes to others’ struggles.

It teaches you to become more compassionate and empathize with those who may be lonely in their aloneness. Not everyone has learned to be content by themselves, and maybe you are meant to be the one to show them how. And being alone helps you truly notice people who may be suffering, giving you time and an opportunity to reach out to them. Whether that’s providing a resource, a listening ear, or just being a companion for someone going through a hard time, this period of life on your own is perfect for trying to help someone.

11. Being alone teaches you that, to find happiness, you truly need to look inward.

Being in a relationship with someone often contributes to immense happiness, but you are the only one who can fulfill yourself and determine whether your heart sings for the long term.

While I hope that reading these words helps you, I also hope you know there is more value in the experience. So before you dive into your next relationship or decide to purposely avoid being alone, remember that this season is trying to teach you something.

There is beauty to be found in being alone, and there is beauty in coming together. The key is to make sure you recognize the lessons you’re meant to learn in each season.

* This article was originally published here

For The Girl Who Was Told She Wasn’t Good Enough

This is for the girl who was told she wasn’t good enough, that it’s impossible for her to achieve her dreams. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise that your vision isn’t worth pursuing.

No matter how much you are criticized for even the slightest flaw on your body, know that you are beautiful inside and out.

For the girl who is subjected to hate, toxic comments on social media, and the pressure of other people’s expectations, my heart reaches out to you, wishing to shield you from all the negativity.

To the girl who is broken and yearning for love, yet has her love thrown back in her face, you are made out of fierce magic. Possibilities are as infinite as the sky or the stars in the universe.

After falling, you are meant to rise. You will overcome all obstacles and prove that you are worth more than what those negative people think you are.

You don’t need validation from someone who adds to your insecurities and doesn’t see you for being the amazing person you are.

This is for the girl who was made to feel like she wasn’t good enough. I hope you find the people who are worth your time. That they are kind souls who uplift you, love you unconditionally, and support you for being you. Someone who lights up a spark of hope and joy deep within you and who’ll never aim to tear you down.

To the girl who needs time to heal, I hope that all of your dreams come true. I hope that you find your tribe, your community of people where you feel safe, respected, and loved.

Even if you’ve been told that you weren’t good enough in the past, I believe there’s still hope for the right people to come into your life, to help you heal.

Your light shines brighter than all those toxic people combined. If someone can’t see your value, it’s their loss.

Continue to shine your brilliant light for the world to see. Don’t let someone’s dark clouds create storms in your blue sky.

* This article was originally published here

You Are Stronger Than All Of Life’s Storms

Inner peace is recognizing that everything is fleeting. Take a moment to imagine that your heart is the sun and that your worries are simply clouds passing by. Now close your eyes and watch your worries move out of your mind’s eye and focus on the warmth of your inner sun.

Inner peace is not a destination; it is a place inside of us. What is often blocking us from this peaceful place is the turmoil that we may feel and comes in various forms like anxiety, stress, overwhelm, etc. These manifestations of chaos are often transient storms that brew within our minds. These storms can sometimes be seasonal or can return like an afternoon summer shower, but they are almost always temporary.

Behind these storms is who we are at our core. Our true nature. Our highest self. Our inner light. And if we permit ourselves to see beyond the weather of our minds, we can see that we are not these storms. We are not our anxieties, worries, or fears. We are so much more. We are the sun and the moon that come back every single day and night, no matter what is happening in the backdrop of their sky (and of our lives). We are resilient, and we are committed.

For no storm is ever powerful enough to take down the brave sun or its soft, loving moon. They keep their heads up and stay valiant and confident while shining down on the world with light and hope. Even on the days we don’t see them as clearly, we can rest assured that they are there. And so even on the days when we feel most disconnected from ourselves or tired from the uncertainty, we can look to the sun and moon inside of us to remind us who we are on the deepest level.

Look to your heart when the clouds start to form. Look to your soul when the mist of the fog rolls in. Look to your inner sun when the rain begins to fall. Remember that you are more powerful than what is happening around you. Look to your light. Look to your love. See yourself for what you are and know that these storms will one day be over, but you will always have that sun inside you, burning with passion and keeping you warm even on the darkest days.

Let your heart continue to light your way.

* This article was originally published here

Read This If You Want To Meditate But Feel Like It’s Impossible

I am not a runner. If somebody told me today that if I ran 10 miles, my life would dramatically improve, they may be right, but there’s no way I’m doing it. Now, if they said to run for 10 minutes, that I could get on board with. I feel this way about meditation.

I always loved the idea of it. I’ve read enough testimonials of its life-changing capacity; I understand the science of why it’s so good for you; but I could barely shut my brain off when I was exhausted at 2 a.m., never mind in the middle of the day. Strange to think that sitting in silence is so intimidating, but if you’re in that place, I understand and I’ve been there. Now sitting in meditation is not only a requirement for me but part of the message I’ve made it my mission to share with the world.

You could find hundreds of explanations and definitions explaining what meditation is and why you should do it. I recommend looking into these and listening with an open mind and heart. The only explanation I can speak fully to is mine, so here it goes: I believe that meditation is the vehicle you use to meet your authentic self.

In our world today, we are constantly bombarded with stimuli—beliefs, opinions, judgments, facts, noises, hysteria, decisions, options. Our world has become small and our culture values conformity, and thus it is hard to distinguish who we are at our core versus what we have learned and picked up from being tossed around the rat wheel.

People are reporting feelings of unhappiness, loneliness, depression, and anxiety at a higher rate than ever in human history. While there are many things we can attribute to this, I believe at the core is that nobody knows themselves. Think about it: How can you win a game if you do not know the goal? To be happy, you have to have your circumstances line up with what you believe will make you happy. If you do not truly know yourself, how can you know what makes you happy? The answer is that you cannot.

What so often happens is that we have taken in all of our societal programming, we thought we knew what would make us happy, and then it turns out that we didn’t. Why? Because that was never really you. Behind the layers of everything we picked up about who and what we are supposed to be is our soul. Your soul is the true, authentic you. In order to meet it, you must be able to tune everything else out. How do you do that? Meditate.

If sitting still, crossed legged, back upright, in silence seems impossible, I hear you, and I have good news! You do not have to do that. In my definition of meditating, basically all you are doing is tuning the world out in order to meet your true, authentic soul. When I first started, there were two major things that helped me.

First, you do not have to sit up straight, crossed legged. As someone who has struggled with chronic pain, that position was honestly just plain uncomfortable for me. Lying down flat on the floor, or even on a bed if you won’t fall asleep, allowed me to feel comfortable and enter a deeper relaxation. My other favorite technique was walking. I think that when you’re new to meditation, it is common for an influx of thoughts to hit you the moment you stop. With my body in motion, I found I was able to focus on the sensations of the breath and body and tune into myself easier than sitting still.

These are two options that were huge for me in the beginning of my meditation practice, and ones that I still use to this day. My point is to focus less on the positioning of the body. The whole idea here is to tune into you. That means that you can make the decision. What would make you comfortable? What would allow you the best opportunity to tune out the noise and into your soul? If that means sitting, walking, running, jumping up and down, lying down, dancing, or doing yoga, go for it.

The second tip I want you to know is that, at first, silence is intimidating. Our world today does not do silence. You can ease yourself in. There are so many great guided meditations available for free on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Music, and all over the web. Honestly, for me personally, it was a long time before I was able to meditate without guidance.

I recommend you shop around. You’ll find there are voices and topics that you like more than others. The best way to begin is to begin. They are available at all different lengths. Type “10-minute guided meditation” into your browser of choice and pick one that jumps out at you. You’ll learn quickly what works for you and what doesn’t and the more you do it, the more you’ll know.

The other option for listening is music. Some meditation teachers suggest listening to any music that helps you to relax and zone out. I am a music freak, so I found that I cannot listen to the songs I would otherwise listen to (or even songs with words, really) because I will become more focused on the song than my intention. I recommend listening to instrumental meditation music. Again, the options are infinite—search for a playlist, press play, and go from there.

I have lived out of alignment and I have lived in alignment. I now understand on a deep level what all the hubbub is around meditation. I believe that our world is a vast, majestic, magical place. I also believe that most of us are missing it. Our society has shut down our access to our authentic self and most of us are just pushing through, doing what we think we’re supposed to do to get by. It saddens me that I meet few people who feel totally in alignment with their authentic soul and purpose—in fact, most people look at me like I’m crazy when I ask (which I do).

They are playing a game and they don’t know the rules, so how can they win? When you learn how to tap into your soul, to find out who you really are, you learn the rules, because the only rules you need to live by in order to be happy are your rules.

Meditation is your tool to learn how to play your game by your rules. Don’t get discouraged by the how—the number of breaths, how to breathe, the position, the silence. Do what feels good for you. As long as the intention is to tune into your authentic self, you are meditating and on your way to happiness, alignment, fulfillment, and winning the game.

* This article was originally published here

From new fearful to The New Possible

Like many among the young grappling with the new normal from Covid-19, Ms Sarah Annuar is upset and wracked with worry. “My anxiety and stress levels …

* This article was originally published here

When It Comes To Sexism In The Workplace, Silence Is No Longer An Option

Being a woman in today’s workplace can be tricky territory to navigate, especially in a sexist, misogynistic, and male-dominated climate. After watching the film Bombshell and seeing stories unfold from the perspective of three different women who got fed up and dared to expose the truth and take a stand against different poor practices in their workplace culture, I was reminded of how hard and challenging taking on this specific kind of fight could be.

“Other women will come forward” was a line from the film that resonated with me the most. It was almost haunting. It reminded me that while some women may feel alone when dealing with different hostile men and challenging the “boys’ club” mentality while moving through their workplaces, we’re not alone in this fight. Coming forward is scary, and it doesn’t mean that telling the truth and calling out what’s wrong will ensure peace, protection, or change. However, I do believe that other women will come forward and continue doing so until there are drastic shifts in how men behave, interact, and treat women in the workplace.

When the #MeToo movement took off, there was no going back. It’s clear that there are women who are not afraid to use their voices and take a stand when challenging systems that don’t protect women, especially in the workplace, but instead guard the reputation and reign of powerful men in charge. It’s obvious that silence is no longer an option.

The next generation of young women need to know that there are many women ahead of them, battling, protesting, and working hard to make sure that when it’s their time to take a new position, career opportunity, or accept a new promotion, they’ll be able to do so without looking over their shoulders or wrestling with fear that a man is coming to dismantle and destroy their confidence, futures, and everything they’ve worked hard for.

I’ve had different male co-workers talk down to me, insult my knowledge, and dismiss my ideas in meetings (and then try to use some of the ideas I originally presented and take credit for them). They’ve been able to get away with their behavior. I’ve heard horror stories from different women in their own workplaces who have told me that their male bosses and colleagues spoke harshly to them, disrespected them, made them cry, and stood in the way of their promotions and future opportunities if they didn’t play the games the men wanted them to play. And that’s wrong.

No woman should ever be put in a compromising position or have her livelihood or career threatened for refusing to engage a male boss or anyone else’s inappropriate advances or because she refuses to do something unethical to get ahead in her career. We can’t allow this to continue.

* This article was originally published here

How to be a highly successful individual (in anything you do)

Have you ever wanted to be successful in something? Whether that be a relationship, your job or a personal goal? Most people would say, “yes.” Being …

* This article was originally published here